I am participating in Multitude Mondays, which is a list of
One Thousand Gifts I've started. You can read more details about it and follow my journey
here. I confess, I'm not the best at sticking to any schedule, as life tends to always happen and I don't like too much structure. Yesterday was my 2nd Monday and a perfect example. I spent almost the entire day at the doctor's office and was not emotionally up to posting my gratitudes last night. Multitude Monday became Thankful Tuesday this week and I'm sure in the future I'll have many Mondays on other days of the week. I do have much to be thankful for, much positive to focus on, even during a diffcult time in my life right now.
And instead of just thinking about the many things I'm thankful for, my mind is on some things I'm greatly anticipating. Some anticipation is cheerful and some of it brings me anxiety. I think of the times Christ said to take no thought and looking up "thought" in the concordance, it means to be anxious or troubled with cares. Wouldn't it be wonderful to reach a point in our relationship with Christ that we take no thought, instead of having to deal with the thoughts when they come? But, the reason Christ is touched with the feelings of our infirmities is because he lived in a body of flesh. I'm reminded of Matthew 26, where Christ, knowing the crucifixion to come, tells his disciples that his soul was exceedingly sorrowful, even unto death. Then he fell on his face and prayed...not for his will, but the Father's.
As my thoughts tended toward the gloomy yesterday and I feel weary, I need this reminder this morning. Not my will, but Thine. Thankful for comfort in Christ, in the Word of God...thankful for comfort from a loving family and compassionate, praying friends. So, said all that to say, here are some things I'm anticipating, little or big, just on my mind this morning.
1. Some cheerful charm packs and fabric arriving in the mail...to work on my mug rugs and a diaper bag. Sewing Therapy is good for this gal!
2. Washing, folding, and organizing baby clothes and blankets.
3. Kristy's piano recittal on Sunday afternoon. Also, her 4-H Creative Contest drawing entry this month. Go Kristy!!!
4. Oh, my Block of the Month block arriving in the mail for the Civil War quilt I'll be working on this year. Excited!
5. Managing my health and Jacob's health the last 3 weeks of this pregnancy. Definitely where most my anxiety is coming from....a deep sense of frustration over how my body doesn't handle pregnancy well at all.
6. The c-section, scheduled for Feb. 9th. Just as soon as I think I've accepted this, I am overcome with fear again. My last c-section was difficult and those memories aren't easily forgotten.
7. But, the anticipation of kissing Jacob, holding him in my arms, nursing him, and loving every moment of this new life I'm blessed with does far outweigh the anxiety I'm feeling. I'm already blessed with being the mom of the three most precious, wonderful children. Another is more than I deserve, but am ever grateful for.
8. My mom and little sister coming to help out. Can't wait to hug my mom!!!
9. Laying on the bed with Russ and our new little one between us, both staring at him in awe, as we've done with the other kids. It's definitely a time of complete joy and humbleness.
10. I'll stop for now with anticipating Russ coming home from work today and giving him a kiss...just thankful he's my husband....and anticipating feeling like his lovely wife again in weeks to come, instead of a miserably sick pregnant one.
Hope to post some fabric pics and new projects soon!! And won't be long before posting pics of our Jacob Zane!